极速赛车168最新开奖号码 Comments on: Social work practice changes urged to promote direct contact between adopted children and birth families

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: David Stainsbury

David Stainsbury — Sun, 17 Nov 2024 18:38:06 +0000

Im an adopter and a sw as well. My son is 20 years old and we have managed to sustain contact with his five birth siblings. I was foster carer to three of his siblings. Initially in the interests of confidentiality there was no direct communication between my wife and I and the other two sets of adopting parents. This led to misunderstandings and communication issues. However we persevered and despite three siblings moving abroad we have almost daily internet contact and once or twice a year face to face contact where my son (and sometimes me) stays with his siblings. He sees his English resident siblings three to five times per year. We have shared special birthdays, family weddings and funerals.

My son strongly feels a sibling bond to both his blood siblings and adopted siblings.

The agreement we made with Children Services was that he could have contact with his siblings or with his parents and his extended family. We chose the siblings although when we were foster carers we had had birthday parties which his grandparents, aunts uncles and cousins had attended.

My son is still keeping to this agreement until his young sisters are 18.

I would agree that contact is valuable and needs to be supported. My sons sisters adopted parents tell me that they are the only members of an adoption group of ten couples that still have contact with the birth family.

However , social workers seem to over think and over analyse the impact of contact to such an extent that the contact becomes sabotaged. For example we were made to tell my son about the birth of his sisters and it was eighteen months until it was the right time for him to meet them. It would have been easy for us as the adopted parents to take our bat and ball home. The sw did not seem to understand that when a child knows he has a sibling he longs for them, we believed there should have been a meeting quite quickly after informing him and it should have been in our home or the baby’s home- it was in a contact centre.

If contact is relaxed and natural it can be an hour, an afternoon, a day or a weekend. It can be a video call or playing on the play station together or a text or phone conversation.

I would have felt comfortable managing the birth parents contact but I know that the other adoptive parents were worried that they would try to abduct the children or might be aggressive or violent.

Post adoption contact is complicated but if we have a clear expectation, offer of support and agreement that adopters are partners in decision making we may be able to do better for future adopted children.

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: Lorraine

Lorraine — Sat, 16 Nov 2024 07:12:25 +0000

Such an interesting debate . I feel that sometimes we forget that there are many reasons as to why children are adopted. Its a gruelling and not taken lightly decision. Once done, the ultimate aim is the security and safety of the child as well as the least disruption to the new parents who may not have children of their own or indeed, do have children. If the courts want adoptive parents to adopt, how do you expect them to build a strong relationship with the child if the focus is on ongoing contact with the biological parents. Im not going to be judgemental but if the biolgical parents are not settled, that would could have been one of the many reasons for the adoption. Letter contact is a good start to enable the biological parents to demonstrate they are committed to having a relationship, if that fails its not the social workers or new parents fault. The process needs to be strengthened and not changed. Once the children can communicate, they can decide , with support how to engage. Fostering is the alternative process if the jugde doesnt wish to support permanent placements and the right for children to have a fresh start, if they had come from an unsafe environment. However, as i said each situation is different (apoligies for any typos)

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: Sarah

Sarah — Fri, 15 Nov 2024 10:39:30 +0000

I am both a social worker and adoptive parent. I don’t think f2f would have been appropriate anyway for my children due to risks and parental engagement so i am aware that my experience here is some what limited. I would just advise caution, not just with risk but also with the destabilising impact f2f contact could possibly have on the adoptive placement and also in ensuring that there is sufficient support for children, their adoptive family and birth family. I would be concerned that this would put off potential adopters. I absolutely agree with the comment above that this could be very positive for some families where learning difficulties have been identified. It’s all about ensuring that the child is central, but supporting the adoptive placement and parents as well which would be very traumatic were it to fail. My experience is that the adoptive families are very much a second thought throughout but are so key in ensuring the best outcomes for the children.

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: Ann

Ann — Thu, 14 Nov 2024 19:26:55 +0000

I think this is particularly relevant to parents with learning disabilities, where often they have tried their very best but due to their learning disability, they have been unable to meet the needs of the child.

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: Christine Greig

Christine Greig — Thu, 14 Nov 2024 08:34:21 +0000

I always feel a void, I was in care system from 3months.
No I wasn’t adopted I was shifted all over the place. Scotland. I feel constantly I don’t belong to anyone no one is mine. I have 4 children, I feel the over compensate for them to show me I belong to them… so yes adoption good idea to keep all informed at parts of ones life. No one can make you feel loved belonging a sence of who you really are, having a family around you helps with all this…x

极速赛车168最新开奖号码 By: andrea nader

andrea nader — Thu, 14 Nov 2024 00:08:15 +0000

Mithras I’m sooo pleased you have covered this .Its a positive move .I work with families who disregard court guidance over post adoption contactNo one seems to make the link between that and children’s m h being ooor and most needing therapy (and yea this adds to pre adoption trauma)